Self Development Helps
Build Self Esteem

Self development can take priority when we have gained an understanding of our human emotions, and achieved a level of emotional freedom.

It is very hard to develop the various aspects of our characters while we are trapped by limiting beliefs, negative emotions, or emotional baggage.

Gaining emotional freedom is in itself a huge part of self development. While we are controlled by emotions, our growth will be seriously limited. Once we have learned to manage our emotions, we can focus on other areas of development. Developing qualities that are important to our increased happiness and fulfillment.

So, what are the aspects of yourself and your life that you want to develop?

Do you want to gain more confidence, a deeper understanding of spirituality, or improve your relationship skills? Maybe you want to become braver about taking risks, and trying new things. Would you like to become better able to keep an emotional balance in times of difficulty? The opportunities for personal development are endless.

A word of warning though- don’t try to develop all the qualities you want at one time. If you take on too much, you will probably feel overwhelmed and ready to give up before you really get started. Start small and start slow.

Decide what the area is you would most like to improve, and take baby steps towards improving it. Big, meaningful changes don’t happen overnight. Self development is a slow process, and there is very rarely a ‘finish line.’ There is almost always more room for growth and development in every area of our lives.

They key is to just keep moving gradually forward, and to look at how far you have come rather than how far you have to go. Even a small amount of progress is a cause for celebration.

Expect too, that you will often take three steps forward and two steps back. Don’t be discouraged by this. It is a normal part of learning and growth. This is one reason young children are much better at learning things than adults. They don’t beat themselves up for falling down often. They just get back up and keep trying (usually with a few tears and tantrums in between of course). Even if you are taking almost as many steps back as forward, the fact that some of your steps are actually moving you towards your goal is what counts.

If you give up in disgust, and stop taking any steps at all, you will stay right where you are now. Or, possibly slide backwards.

It is almost impossible for us to stay at a fixed level in any area of our lives. Take learning a language. If you are not getting better, or at least practicing enough to maintain your level, then you will undoubtedly be getting worse. Our skills go downhill from lack of use.

The same goes with our self development. We need to be constantly doing something to progress towards our goals, or at least enough to keep the level that we have already achieved.

Let’s say that your goal is to get over a fear of speaking in public. You join Toastmasters, give a few talks and start to feel nervous rather than terrified. Then work gets really hectic, or you start dating someone new. You skip meetings for a couple of months. The next time you attend and need to give a speech, you are right back to terrified.

The good news is though, the further you have gotten towards a goal, the easier it will be to get back to where you were if you stop progressing for a while and slip backwards. If you are fluent in French, and then stop speaking it for five years, it probably won’t take you long to brush up. If you have had lessons for two months and then stop for five years, it’s a pretty good bet that you’ll be back to square one when you start again.

If possible try to avoid interruptions until you have built your progress to a level you feel confident about. Even better is to continue with your development. Part of a happy and fulfilled life is to be always learning and always growing.

Self development is a wonderful use of your time and aside from the skills and qualities you can achieve, personal growth helps to build self esteem, confidence and happiness.

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