If you are feeling tired, stressed, emotionally drained, angry, sad, or depressed, there is something that you need. The trick is to figure out what it is.

Whether it is a walk, a nap, a hug, a cry, a talk to a friend, half an hour of journal writing, a bubble bath, an episode of a favorite comedy show, to shout and beat the sofa, or just take a few good deep breaths and light a candle with some scented oil, there is always something that can help you feel better- fast.

Deciding what type of treatment will ease your pain starts with identifying the cause, and the nature, of your feelings.

Whatever the emotions are that you are having, recognize that they are normal and okay. We all have many types of feelings from time to time. Some of these feelings are not nice to have, but pretending that they are not there doesn’t make them go away. Denying or suppressing emotions actually has the opposite result, and intensifies them. The feelings will pass, and you don’t need to act on them in an inappropriate way. By understanding and accepting negative emotions, you will be able to release them and feel more positive much more easily.

A case of negative emotion is like a vitamin deficiency. Something has sapped the positive energy from your body, and left a nasty symptom like anger or sadness. Once you have figured out what you are really feeling and why, you will be better able to decide on a course of treatment.

Whatever the feeling, and whatever you decide you need to do to feel better, try to choose a healthy alternative. Rather than comforting yourself with a bottle of wine, consider having a massage. It probably won’t cost much more, and it will give you a much better result. A massage can leave you feeling relaxed, destressed, and soothed, and the feelings can linger for days.

Alcohol on the other hand may have a temporarily soothing effect, but it doesn’t do you much good over-indulging, and can actually act as a depressant. You may feel better while you are drowning your sorrows, but very likely you will feel even more miserable by the end of the evening and certainly not great the next morning either!

When you are feeling down, and need to feel better, try opting for an activity that you would suggest to a friend who was miserable. Most of us give great advice- we are just lousy at taking it. If you know that your unhappy friend would feel much better after a nice bike ride through the park, that means that you would too! Rather than giving into your inclinations to sit in front of a soap opera with a box of chocolates, force yourself to get out and take that bike ride. Hard as it may be to make yourself do it, you will be glad you did afterwards.

We talk about using "tough love" when we encourage others to do what’s best rather than what’s easiest. We can also apply that concept in making healthy choices for ourselves. We need to be tough on ourselves about doing things that will really help us feel better rather than the easy ‘band-aid’ fixes that temporarily mask the feelings we are seeking to soothe, but usually leave us feeling worse than before.

Next time you find yourself asking ‘how can I feel better emotionally?’ take a few minutes to find a good answer, rather than grabbing the first thing you crave. Usually if you take the time to really stop and think about what you are feeling and why, your intuition will tell you what would truly help you to feel better.

When you have figured out what kind of ‘therapy’ your frayed nerves need, make it a priority to get it. Clear some time, cancel what you don’t really have to do, ask a friend to help out babysitting for an hour, or just turn off your phone. There is usually very little that can’t wait, but when you are run down and running on empty, recharging yourself and your spirits is both urgent and important.

Trying to keep going when you are feeling low will only result in burn out. You are also very unlikely to be able to do a good job of anything while you are depleted. Nobody is born with a lifetime supply of energy and good feelings. We all need to fuel ourselves regularly in order to live our lives in the best way we can.

Take care of yourself and your needs. You will feel better, and you will be able to carry on with your life and your work with renewed energy and a positive outlook.

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