Authentic Happiness Can Change Your Life

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Authentic Happiness and How to Create It

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Authentic happiness is one of the most precious things that we can possess. It allows us to live fully and joyfully, rather than just going through the motions of our lives. While just about everyone states that happiness is something they want to experience, why are so few people living lives filled with true happiness?

The biggest, in fact the only, thing standing between you and the authentic happiness you were born to enjoy is a barrier created by beliefs. This article explores 12 common beliefs that block us from experiencing deep and lasting happiness. At the end of the article, you will find 12 affirmations designed to help in overcoming these beliefs.

BELIEFS THAT BLOCK HAPPINESS

Believing that happiness depends on what is going on around us.
If we are waiting until every circumstance of our lives is perfect and problem-free before we allow ourselves to be happy, we will never experience authentic happiness. One of the keys to happiness is to learn to be happy no matter what is going on around us. This does not mean it is possible, or healthy, to be 100% happy 100% of the time. However, happiness is a choice that we make by deciding to focus on what is good in ourselves, our lives and the world around us. By accepting that we live in an imperfect world, we can decide that even though there are things in our lives that we might like to change, we can still experience happiness much of the time.
Believing that our happiness depends on another person/other people.
Waiting for someone else to come along and ‘make’ us happy is very disempowering. If our very happiness depends on another person, we put ourselves in a passive role in our own lives. This can also create feelings of neediness or clinginess, as we feel our wellbeing is dependent on the presence in our lives of someone else. We can tend to fall into traps of people pleasing and approval addiction when we feel that the reactions of another person can make or break our happiness. Accepting that our happiness is dependent only on ourselves is liberating. It places the responsibility squarely on our shoulders, where it belongs, and allows us to reclaim our power over our lives, and work at creating authentic happiness for ourselves.
Believing that we don’t deserve to be happy, or that happiness must be earned.
In order to create and experience authentic happiness in our lives, we need to overcome the often deep-seated belief that we are somehow flawed and unworthy of happiness. The people you see who are genuinely happy are no more deserving than you; they have simply learned to accept their own value. Overcoming feelings of unworthiness can be done by building a solid sense of self worth, as well as using tools such as EFT, visualization and affirmations to reprogram negative beliefs.
Believing that material success can bring us happiness.
Happiness based on external factors is fleeting at best. If we need to have certain physical circumstances in order to feel happy, this ‘happiness’ can be threatened very easily. While there is definitely satisfaction to be enjoyed from achievements, authentic happiness needs to be created solidly within ourselves. When we have created a deep sense of wellbeing, then we can enjoy our successes for what they are- icing on the cake, without fearing that our happiness depends on how long they last.
Believing that we are not smart enough/attractive enough/thin enough/rich enough to enjoy authentic happiness.
This belief has some things in common with both number 3 and number 4. We believe that we are in some way not good enough to be happy, and that certain external circumstances (which seem to be always out of reach) would bring us the lasting happiness we crave. There is no logical reason to believe that a different appearance or more money would bring us authentic happiness. You only need to read the tabloid gossip to see evidence that some of the most famous, beautiful and wealthy people on the planet also happen to have trouble finding happiness. Happiness comes from accepting our own inner goodness and connection to our higher selves. We become happier by allowing ourselves to embrace and fully experience life’s joys and challenges.
Believing that happiness is always just around the corner/ just out of reach.
Believing that happiness is something that happens only in fairytales.
Believing that happiness only happens to other people.
Numbers 6, 7 and 8 all stem from our unwillingness or inability to believe that authentic happiness is possible for us. We either convince ourselves that happiness doesn’t truly exist (number 7), that for some unknown reasons we are not among the ‘lucky’ few that are the winners of the happiness lottery, or that happiness is a carrot on the end of a stick that is forever being moved just beyond our reach. These, like any of the preceding beliefs are simply untrue, but if we hold onto them, they have the power to prevent us from enjoying true happiness. Recognize that there is no evidence to prove these beliefs, and decide to let them go. Form new and empowering beliefs about what you are willing and able to create in your life, and watch happiness unfold like a bud bursting into bloom.
Believing that a difficult past means creating happiness is beyond us.
One thought that can lead to this belief is that we cannot attain authentic happiness because we have not been taught from childhood how to be happy. While those who did experience a joyful and fairly problem-free youth are certainly blessed, and may have a head start on knowing how to be happy, consider the opposite side of the coin. Having a more challenging background provides many lessons in strength and resilience. These qualities are vitally important in being able to maintain happiness and wellbeing through the ups and downs that life inevitably brings. It is also helpful to remember that many of us were not trained in childhood to do the jobs we grow up to do, drive a car, or file our taxes, but we learn to do these things anyway. Happiness is a skill that can be learned and honed, just like any other skill.
Believing that happiness is fleeting and fragile.
While happiness, like all emotions and experiences in life has periods of ebb and flow, we can create a solid, underlying core of happiness and wellbeing that can remain, and support us, even in periods of difficulty and sadness. The stronger this core of happiness, the more easily we can pass through times of trouble, and draw on our deep inner reserves of wellbeing. When our default state is one of happiness, we will find that we can bounce back to this authentic happiness from any ups and downs faster and more readily.
Believing that happiness is irresponsible.
There can be a deep-seated belief that happiness is somehow frivolous, and that we should ‘grow up,’ and be sober, solemn, and serious. I challenge you to defy this belief, and choose happiness and joy over doom and gloom. This is not to say that we shouldn’t be responsible. I take my responsibilities very seriously, but that doesn’t mean I can’t carry them out carefully and diligently AND with a spring in my step and a twinkle in my eye. Life does not have to be beige! Color your world with happiness!
Believing that it is wrong to enjoy authentic happiness in a world where there is suffering.
Yes, there is suffering in the world. People experience great loss, pain and hardship, and compassion for humankind is an incredibly important thing to have. But, does your happiness is any way contribute to, or increase, anyone else’s suffering? If you are living a life of genuine happiness, the answer cannot possibly be ‘yes.’ In fact you are much more likely to be helping ease other people’s suffering, and true happiness radiates out like a light to those around. If you are forcing yourself to suffer, by depriving yourself of happiness, then you are only increasing the level of suffering in the world. When you are happy, and your deep inner needs are being filled, you can love, give, comfort and help from a place of wholeness and fullness. As the proverb tells us, ‘if you’re not part of the solution, you’re part of the problem.’ Resolve to be part of the solution, and allow yourself to experience authentic happiness; for your own sake, and for the good of the world around you, too.

AFFIRMATIONS FOR HAPPINESS

I have everything I need within me, and I am creating happiness for myself.
I am learning to accept that I deserve happiness.
Whatever is happening around me, I have happiness within.
Happiness is within my reach.
Happiness is at the core of who I am.
I allow myself to embrace the happiness that flows into me through an open heart.
I accept that I deserve to be happy.
I have everything I need to be happy.
My happiness is deep and unmoved by the winds of change.
My happiness depends on me, and I claim the happiness that is rightfully mine.
As an inseparable part of a loving Universe, I accept the happiness that is equally my right as every living being.
I radiate happiness and joy to all around me.